Mark (mrbartleboom) wrote,

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Pretty Ravenna.

Just wanted to share even here my thoughts about Snow White and the Huntsman, that came out today here in Italy and, normally, I should have paid 8 euros, since it's a premiere, but I managed to spend just 5 euros, pretending to be still a student with my uni card that, somehow, will expire in 4 years. W00T me.

That'd be a translation from Italian of my stream of thoughts that I posted on the Corrs forum, so bear with me and my sudden changes of topics. And, of course, spoiler for anyone that has not seen it.

First half of the movie, mmm, okay. Second half, OMG WHAT IS THAT. The magic land in a very cheap cgi that reminded me the Teletubbies world, those fairies, the stag that blesses Snow, OMG HALP.

KStew. I don't get if she can act. I've just seen her in Twilight (let's skip this part), a B movie when she was like 13 and her mother was Sharon Stone, and this one. She has just this one face. Maybe in English she sounds better, she looks better, IDK, I've only seen her dubbed in Italian. IMHO, I think the dubbing saved her here, it looked like she's got this verve she didn't have. She also scared me when she was there, fighting, looking at Ravenna on her balcony, with her hair up and her ears in sight. OH GOD. D: And I was wondering, when exactly did she learn how to dance and how to fight, being always locked in that tower? *facepalm

I wanted a more detailed flashback for poor Ravenna. LET ME HOLD YOU BB. Charlize wins at life in this movie, word. Every now and then I whispered to my sister "I miss Ravenna, she's not appearing on screen, IT'S AGES, I'm pissed off".

lol, my sister: "Look, Lily Cole!" Me: "Nah, this is a redshirt lasting two minutes tops, I don't think Lily Cole would do anything like this." Credits: Greta - Lily Cole. WHUT. She started well, this girl. Then she did the mermaid without lines in Doctor Who, and now two minutes as a redshirt in SW&TH? Bah.

KStew'Snow is jinxed, anyway. She finds the horse on the beach, two seconds later he dies in shifting sands. She arrives in the village, and two hours later it's all flames, burnings and raping. Super-blessed-stag appears and in zero time has an arrow in his neck. She dances with the ginger dwarf and, hello arrow, nice to meet you! Holy crap. 

I hoped for a better and more epic confrontation between Snow and Ravenna. The queen spoke, but the other side was not decent enough. KStew just mumbled words, while trying to hit her with the sword. C'mon, even I could have hit her in a more classy way. Shut the fuck up KStew, let me kill Ravenna. I mean, no, I think I would have surrended on the spot to my queen, but still. <3

Of course I stayed alone in the cinema (with my sister), singing Breath of Life while the other people were leaving and I was all overexcited and jumping on my spot.

And now, shipper moment. Of course no declarations by the end of the movie. But she perfectly knew it was the Huntsman that had waken her up (I gathered that from the looks they exchanged on the beach, before the fights inside the castle) . And those glances at the end, at the coronation? We can hope for the better? <3
Tags: charlize theron, florence and the machine, kstew, movies, randomness, snow white and the huntsman
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